Dear Sprint,

You suck ass. And not pretty ass either. You suck old dirty ass. Thanks for sending me to collections because I forgot to send you the death certificate when my mom died. Thanks for adding early termination charges when I cancelled the plan. Because my mom died. And the best part one yet, thanks for letting my mom use my social security number when she signed up for the plan, so I am responsible for the phone charges. I will never use Sprint products, I will also advise my friends and family to avoid your company like it is the black plague. You want the 361 dollars because you lost out when my mom died. I hope you choke on it.

Sincerely,
Lorelai