Fasten Your Seat Belts, It's Going To Be A Bumpy Ride
Tomorrow morning I will be taking my mother to the coast for 2.5 days. Pray for me, or think good/peaceful thoughts. I am somewhat apprehensive about being in a car for 3 hours with a woman whose major hallucination is that people are following her in cars. This should be great. She called me today to tell me that "they" (the people following her in cars) have been quiet today. Hopefully they'll stay home this weekend. Yesterday when I found out for sure we were going I called a friend of mine because I knew he would understand the apprehension, hope, and guilt that goes along with having a parent who suffers from psychosis.
I have spent this entire week alone and I think it was because of what I will face this weekend (mentally gearing up so to speak). I hope she is in a good mood. I pray that I will have patience for when she's not. I also hope this weekend is something I can look back on with fondness. I have realized in the last few weeks (especially after my g-pa's death) that we have not had many fond mother/daughter moments. More than anything I hope this is a good weekend for her. That even for a couple of days her hallucinations take a break and that she can be happy.
I am sure I will have lots to blog about on Sunday. Or I will drinking too heavily to blog. At this point it could go either way.