Some Days I Am Not Paid Enough

I was walking in the hallway right now and someone stopped me and asked me to look at something that was found on the ground. Note to future self, don't touch random things given to you. As I looked at it and tried to figure what it was the people walked away, leaving me with the device. It was small, required a battery, and had an instruction not to put on inflamed skin, or skin that had erupted, or if this device causes pain to stop using. Given it's shape and the previous description I am pretty sure I was holding part of a pocket vibrator, and had a freak out moment in my head. I went straight to the industrial size hand sanitizer and threw the piece out. I then went to the people who handed it to me in the first place, and made them use the sanitizer too. This was after having a child tantrum so hard I thought he was going to puke on my shoes. I heart Wednesdays.